Forever Single
There is a part of me that truly wants to be married again. There is a bigger part of me that knows damn well what a freakish fantasy that is once you are divorced and have children.
My weekend with Mr Live in continued in arguements. I swear the pettiness will be never ending. Im not sure if it is him, or if it is just the bliss of two retards trying to blend families. Some people pull it off without a problem....I obviously will not be one of the fortunate ones.
We arranged our visitations so that we had all of the children one weekend and a weekend alone the next. For the most part this doesnt get too far off track and we get a little adult time. At times, having my kids all week and all of them (there are 6) every other weekend makes me feel completley bonkers. I dont complain, this schedule is the best we could hack out.
Occasionally one of his sons doesnt come. He spends the weekend with Grandma or a friend...wherever, we dont refuse him the priviledge of having a life outside visitation. You would think that mine would deserve the very same consideration, but this weekend played out rather badly.....
Each of my children had plans. One had a birthday slumber party, and the other two Halloween parties. This caused a problem for Mr Live In. Just what were HIS children supposed to do? We dont live in the same neighborhood, the children do not have the same friends and never once have I insisted that one of my children accompany his to any function outside of our house. I was baffled at his stupidity, but not willing to make my kids stay home to entertain his.
We drop my daughter off at her birthday party. We are asked to stay for cake and happily oblige. The mom has been my best friend for over 10 years. He sulks, watching his watch and demanding that we leave at 4 so that we can take his children to the matinee. His son gets agitated at me, complaining he is bored. He is being fed fucking cake and is watching a child open gifts and I am getting the leg kick to go.
We take his children to the matinee. They cant sit still. They are 13 and 9, but it's "because they hardly ever get to go to the show" Fuck you, Ive taken them here with you, you idiot. They are up and down several times to the bathroom. (Something he would bitch at me for allowing mine to do) and eating our nachos (a pet peeve of his when I share with my daughter).
He insists on taking me electronics shopping. Again, he is on the trip that he is buying me a birthday present. I tell him that I am not 5, I dont care about birthday presents. He proceeds to tell me that it wasnt fair that all I got for my birthday is flowers. I assure him that it is fine, but he gets persistent. The more persistent be becomes, the more agitated I become. Why is it that you feel like buying me something expensive the day before YOUR birthday and months after my own??? Is this a bargaining ploy because it sure feels like one to me.
Blending families is hard. Its always lopsided......at least in my experience. Both parents feel their children are being cheated and mistreated. Parents become immature imbasils when this happens.
I'm frustrated with him right now to the point that I cannot begin to describe my emotions in this blog. I feel like I want to move as far away from him as possible. I want to run. To not speak to him again. To leave him in his own little world of pettiness and complaining.
I had to tell him that for the first time in a long time I am not apologetic for my actions. There are so many times I feel like I am over reacting, over emotional. He pushes me there, on purpose. Then he stands back and tells everyone that I am crazy when the fireworks start. I would get confused about what happened, it all being so petty and ridiculous. I lose details, cant remember things I did a few days ago. But I seem to be coming out of some of that. I am well aware now that he is worsening my illness at times, and that he too is suffering from a mood disorder.
Who but a freak would ask questions like this:
Why did you withdrawl $20 from the bank account.
Im not sure...that was days ago, but Im sure it was along the lines of cigarettes, etc. I dont go anywhere but work and home.
I understand that. But you went to the ATM at 5:15. Where did you go after that?
Hmm, that was four days ago. I cant really remember. We must have needed somthing from the store.
You went on Wednesday at 5:45. What was that for. You lied to me. You said the bathroom tiles came from child support, but that was the same day you bought the tiles. Did you go to the tile store after you went to the bank?
Err, I cant recall exactly. I was sure it was from child support, but if you have any doubts, I will gladly refund you the $14 for the tiles.
Thats not the point.
I'm not sure what the point is .....
The point is that you spend money and dont remember when or what on.
I wasnt aware that the exact time and date were necessary for your record keeping.
So, what else did you lie about?
At this point I have become a raging lunatic. I ask him how he would like it if I followed him around out of town all week with a microscope up his ass counting every dime he spends and demanding details, right down to the time of purchase.
Good God, this has to be an illness, normal people arent this sick.
My weekend with Mr Live in continued in arguements. I swear the pettiness will be never ending. Im not sure if it is him, or if it is just the bliss of two retards trying to blend families. Some people pull it off without a problem....I obviously will not be one of the fortunate ones.
We arranged our visitations so that we had all of the children one weekend and a weekend alone the next. For the most part this doesnt get too far off track and we get a little adult time. At times, having my kids all week and all of them (there are 6) every other weekend makes me feel completley bonkers. I dont complain, this schedule is the best we could hack out.
Occasionally one of his sons doesnt come. He spends the weekend with Grandma or a friend...wherever, we dont refuse him the priviledge of having a life outside visitation. You would think that mine would deserve the very same consideration, but this weekend played out rather badly.....
Each of my children had plans. One had a birthday slumber party, and the other two Halloween parties. This caused a problem for Mr Live In. Just what were HIS children supposed to do? We dont live in the same neighborhood, the children do not have the same friends and never once have I insisted that one of my children accompany his to any function outside of our house. I was baffled at his stupidity, but not willing to make my kids stay home to entertain his.
We drop my daughter off at her birthday party. We are asked to stay for cake and happily oblige. The mom has been my best friend for over 10 years. He sulks, watching his watch and demanding that we leave at 4 so that we can take his children to the matinee. His son gets agitated at me, complaining he is bored. He is being fed fucking cake and is watching a child open gifts and I am getting the leg kick to go.
We take his children to the matinee. They cant sit still. They are 13 and 9, but it's "because they hardly ever get to go to the show" Fuck you, Ive taken them here with you, you idiot. They are up and down several times to the bathroom. (Something he would bitch at me for allowing mine to do) and eating our nachos (a pet peeve of his when I share with my daughter).
He insists on taking me electronics shopping. Again, he is on the trip that he is buying me a birthday present. I tell him that I am not 5, I dont care about birthday presents. He proceeds to tell me that it wasnt fair that all I got for my birthday is flowers. I assure him that it is fine, but he gets persistent. The more persistent be becomes, the more agitated I become. Why is it that you feel like buying me something expensive the day before YOUR birthday and months after my own??? Is this a bargaining ploy because it sure feels like one to me.
Blending families is hard. Its always lopsided......at least in my experience. Both parents feel their children are being cheated and mistreated. Parents become immature imbasils when this happens.
I'm frustrated with him right now to the point that I cannot begin to describe my emotions in this blog. I feel like I want to move as far away from him as possible. I want to run. To not speak to him again. To leave him in his own little world of pettiness and complaining.
I had to tell him that for the first time in a long time I am not apologetic for my actions. There are so many times I feel like I am over reacting, over emotional. He pushes me there, on purpose. Then he stands back and tells everyone that I am crazy when the fireworks start. I would get confused about what happened, it all being so petty and ridiculous. I lose details, cant remember things I did a few days ago. But I seem to be coming out of some of that. I am well aware now that he is worsening my illness at times, and that he too is suffering from a mood disorder.
Who but a freak would ask questions like this:
Why did you withdrawl $20 from the bank account.
Im not sure...that was days ago, but Im sure it was along the lines of cigarettes, etc. I dont go anywhere but work and home.
I understand that. But you went to the ATM at 5:15. Where did you go after that?
Hmm, that was four days ago. I cant really remember. We must have needed somthing from the store.
You went on Wednesday at 5:45. What was that for. You lied to me. You said the bathroom tiles came from child support, but that was the same day you bought the tiles. Did you go to the tile store after you went to the bank?
Err, I cant recall exactly. I was sure it was from child support, but if you have any doubts, I will gladly refund you the $14 for the tiles.
Thats not the point.
I'm not sure what the point is .....
The point is that you spend money and dont remember when or what on.
I wasnt aware that the exact time and date were necessary for your record keeping.
So, what else did you lie about?
At this point I have become a raging lunatic. I ask him how he would like it if I followed him around out of town all week with a microscope up his ass counting every dime he spends and demanding details, right down to the time of purchase.
Good God, this has to be an illness, normal people arent this sick.
posted by Gigglezngrinz at 2:31 PM
3 Comments:
Mr. Live in should be Mr. Kicked OUT! I can't stand guys like that, especially ones that have a double standard for the kids, that's BS. Anyways, as you may surmise, I don't care for him. Give him a swift kick in the rear for me! :)
Well...
NORMAL men do not act that way. Next time he corners you on a $20 ATM withdrawl tell him that you are sponsoring a child in Cambodia, and it's name is PHUCK YU! Then get a 6 month headache...
Remember, putting the batteries for the remote in backwards is the cruelest thing to do to a man...
seriously, i was in a relationship like that...where receipts for frickin gum was a big deal...no fun, you start resenting the person and things get strained. I agree Mr Live In should be Mr Kicked Out...you'd be happier, I was.
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