Pissy Pants

Ohhh, apparently sleeping my entire weekend was not enough. I have to sit here at my desk and do the head bob as well. Lovely. I hate days that feel like you left your brain somewhere else and while I try downing as many pots of coffee as my kidneys will allow - the only thing I am accomplishing is restocking the bathroom with fresh toilet paper.

Ive been finding everything about life completely annoying for the past four or five days. I SAW the guy in the shop take the last of the coffee in the breakroom and not make a new pot. I saw him weasel out of the breakroom as if he had not just committed a cardinal sin. Everyone knows that rule. How hard is it for the lazy slob to just make a fresh pot anyway? You take it, you make it - you're momma doesnt work here and neither does your wife.

I love my job. Truly. But my coworkers I am finding rather annoying. The girl upstairs who insists on telling me every dumb detail of her weekend, who keeps insisting that I come up to her office to view the picture of the latest guy she has met on line. I know theses types. Truly they dont want my damn opinion on whether or not he is cute, looks like he would be funny, etc. etc. They just want to share something I dont give two shits about and want a lame excuse to drag me into their world of drama. I prefer to earn my paycheck - with the exception of the occasional blog here and there and the occasional need to disctract myself and group by reading the news. My work must get done. And no, Im not interested in sharing my lunch hour with you today so that you can fill me in on more mindless drivel. Its the same conversation over and over and honestly I dont think I look so stupid you need to tell me twice. Oh wait, did you realize I was not listening? That does not mean I will be any more interested the second time around. That is my kind way of saying shut up. k? When I ask you how your weekend was, please keep it to a three sentence minimum. I give you that respect. Do you have any idea what I did all weekend?????? Hmmmm, no. Why is that? Because I dont spend the first hour of work time rehashing my conversations with everyone to you!! Do I think you would give a shit? No. Please have the same consideration. If you get past three sentences and see that we are no longer making eye contact or that I am answering my email......please excuse yourself up to your office and do your job. That is the real reason we came here. If you need a signal, such as me clearing my voice when I am ready for you to shut up......I will be happy to oblige. The only exception to the three sentence rule is on days like today where I fully admit that I am operating in complete bitch mode. If I tell you that, it means a simple "Good morning" is all I want to hear from you. And until you drag a real life stud into your office, please dont call me up there on your fantasies. Thanks.